The Power of Simple Days and Present Moments

Today (January 18, 2012) we are snowed in. It is 18 degrees out (even colder with the wind chill factor) and there are 8 inches of snow out my front door. I did manage to bundle up (with motivation from my 13 year old!) and take my dog for an hour and a half walk. It was beautiful. (Here’s a photo I took while on my walk.)

Earlier in the day I made myself a yummy brunch of home potatoes and eggs. And as I was cooking and enjoying some peace and quiet, I was thinking about my work and supporting parents who are co-parenting with their former spouse and began to wonder what my morning of cooking breakfast could possibly have to do with that.

And then I realized it – EVERYTHING and NOTHING.

WHY? Because when I am really present in the moment of what I am doing, whether it’s cooking myself a tasty meal, walking my dog, playing with my sons, visiting with a friend, or reading a good book that is all I am focused on and thinking about. My energy is focused on those things and not on some interaction I may have had earlier with my former husband or a conversation we will have later.

When I am really present with whatever is right in front of me the other stuff is not there.

I realize this is not easy to do. So here is a suggestion to help you:

When you find your mind going on and on about your former, bring it back to your breath or what you are doing in the moment – even if it is just sitting somewhere – and focus your attention there.

This gets easier over time and with practice.

Give it a try and let me know what you think please. I love to hear your feedback.

In support ~


Cat J. Zavis is an Attorney, Mediator and Coach for Divorced and Divorcing Parents. As a divorced mother of 2, she deeply understands the challenges, trauma and opportunities divorce provides. She has been practicing Nonviolent Communication, Mediation and Collaborative Law for 7 years. She has conducted workshops and trainings in Nonviolent Communication for hundreds of parents, lawyers, teachers, students, spiritual centers and professionals. In 2009, she was awarded a Peace Builder Award for her business. She has taught at universities in Western Washington on diverse topics such as Women and the Law, Constitutional Law, and Communication. Her combination of personal experience and professional expertise give Cat a unique perspective and ability to help clients learn to communicate effectively and powerfully to transform their relationships and interactions with their former partner or spouse so they and their children can thrive.


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