I’ve never really been one to hide my feelings or truth. In fact, many people have told me I wear my heart on my sleeve – this was NOT a compliment! Rather, it was something to avoid at all costs!

So over the years, I seemed to learn through experience that being vulnerable was not something that really served me. And yet, really, I didn’t and still don’t know how else to live.

Then I left my husband and about a year later began a new relationship. One day I realized there were some truths I wanted to share and explore but I was afraid – partly due to my experience with my Ex and partly due to the lessons learned over the years about vulnerability.

And then I made a PROMISE to MYSELF. The only scary thing about being vulnerable is the possibility that someone will actually SEE me or worse, JUDGE me. (I believe we all want to be seen until we are seen and then we want to hide! Probably because we are afraid of being judged.)

But really, what’s the worst that can happen if I’m vulnerable?

“They” will tell you that if you are vulnerable you can get hurt. Really? How? Who can hurt me? If I know my truth and stand in my power, who can really hurt me? I am confident that no one is a harsher critic of me than me!! (I’m working on this and will write about that another time.)

So I have committed to myself to live in RADICAL VULNERABILITY because that is the only path I know to FREEDOM. That means I am willing to take risks, speak my truth and enjoy the ride! After all, why else are we here?

Stay tuned for further musings on this topic and examples of how I practice and live this in my life, even with my former husband.

In exploration and support of your freedom ~




Cat J. Zavis is an Attorney, Mediator and Coach for Divorced and Divorcing Parents. She has conducted workshops and trainings in Nonviolent CommunicationSM for hundreds of parents, lawyers, teachers, students, spiritual centers and professionals. In 2009, she was awarded a Peace Builder Award for her business. Her passion is helping parents learn how to communicate and work with their former partner or spouse so they and their children not just survive divorce, but thrive.

clipart: graur razvan ionut

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