For some reason I’ve been thinking a lot lately about learning to walk. This theme keeps coming up in my life so I’ve decided to explore it and write about it. Here’s the thing, when children are learning to walk we don’t laugh at them or tell them how they’ll fail. In fact, we KNOW they will succeed.
We stand by and cheer them on. At first we hold their little hands as they try to walk and, in the age of facebook, we probably post on our page how far our child walked or the fact that she took her first step or that he made it across the room. We are at least as thrilled as they are.
They are simply doing exactly what drives and motivates them – to walk! They want to move and experience freedom and success. It is amazing how completely unafraid they really are. And they KNOW they will succeed. The thought of failure NEVER enters their minds. They fall down and we smile and say “great job”, “look how far you made it”, “you can do it”, “try again”.
So what does this have to do with parenting with your former spouse or partner you ask?
EVERYTHING. . .
Because you will learn to move on in your life. You will succeed in whatever you put your mind to. YOU CAN DO IT.
This is an opportunity for you to trust yourself just as you did when you were learning to walk (or crawl, or read, or talk). You will likely fall down and scrape your knee. It may hurt at times. You may need someone there to cheer you on and give you a big hug along the way.
But you will not only survive and walk, but pretty soon, you will be running and thriving as well.
If I can support you on this journey, be there to cheer you on, remind you that you CAN do it? Please feel free to contact me, I’d be honored to be of service.
In service and support ~
Cat Zavis is an Attorney, Mediator and Coach for Divorced and Divorcing Parents. As a divorced mother of 2, she deeply understands the challenges, trauma and opportunities divorce provides. She has been practicing Nonviolent Communication, Mediation and Collaborative Law for 7 years. She has conducted workshops and trainings in Nonviolent Communication for hundreds of parents, lawyers, teachers, students, spiritual centers and professionals. In 2009, she was awarded a Peace Builder Award for her business. She has taught at universities in Western Washington on diverse topics such as Women and the Law, Constitutional Law, and Communication. Her combination of personal experience and professional expertise give Cat a unique perspective and ability to help clients learn to communicate effectively and powerfully to transform their relationships and interactions with their former partner or spouse so they and their children can thrive.
Photo by: David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
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