Judgments, Criticisms and Blame – An Opportunity for Deeper Self Awareness

How to Transform Judgments, Criticisms and Blame We all have judgments of ourselves, our partners, our children, our parents, bosses, teachers, but none are stronger than those we have of our former partners, lovers and spouses. Why is it that … [Read more...]

The Gift of Grief

As a divorced parent, I deeply know what it feels like to grieve the loss of my marriage – even though I was the one who chose the divorce, even though it has been almost 5 years since I moved out, and even though I have a fabulous new relationship. … [Read more...]


A few things I’m grateful for . . . some may even surprise you! (This list is in no particular order!) My former spouse I am grateful that we spent years together laughing, exploring, dreaming and building a future. I am especially grateful that … [Read more...]

But I’m So Reasonable. . .

You ask your former partner or spouse to do something that you think is completely reasonable (e.g., answer your calls, respond to your emails or texts, check your availability before leaving the kids with you on his/her time). S/he refuses. You … [Read more...]

Ahh, if only the weather would cooperate . . .

Sometimes life can be hard and sad and when it is, I want the weather to cheer me up!! I am feeling a bit melancholy and the weather is not doing her part to cheer me up. It is a gloomy, windy, very rainy day here in Bellingham, WA and I am angry … [Read more...]

Learning to Walk . . . And Thriving After Divorce: The Commonalities!

For some reason I’ve been thinking a lot lately about learning to walk. This theme keeps coming up in my life so I’ve decided to explore it and write about it. Here’s the thing, when children are learning to walk we don’t laugh at them or tell them … [Read more...]

Ex, Former . . . Word Choice Matters

I have had many conversations with various people about what to call the other parent of your child(ren). One friend of mine, Monica McGuire (of Family Culture Coach), has spoken of the term “wusband” and “past wife experience”! The term “ex” … [Read more...]

Does Sharing Time Make You DIZZY?!

I often have clients argue about the amount of time their child will spend in each parent’s home. Instead of fighting over hours and days, I try to get them to focus on what type of relationship they want with their child. When they do this, they … [Read more...]

The Power of Simple Days and Present Moments

Today (January 18, 2012) we are snowed in. It is 18 degrees out (even colder with the wind chill factor) and there are 8 inches of snow out my front door. I did manage to bundle up (with motivation from my 13 year old!) and take my dog for an hour … [Read more...]

It’s All a Matter of Perspective . . .

WHAT do you see in this picture? A young woman, an old woman, nothing . . .? Depending on how you look at this photo, you may see an old woman, a young woman or maybe you can’t make out either. Perhaps it is easy for you to go back and forth … [Read more...]