Cat J. Zavis, Counselor at Law

How do we find peace in the face of duress or distress?  For me, the process of finding peace in the face of disharmony involves reminding myself that I have the power to choose how I am going to react in each moment - will I choose inner peace or inner distress?

Through my practice of Nonviolent Communication and other strategies, I have learned to slow down, connect with inner self and breathe so that I can remain grounded and peaceful even when faced with duress and distress in my interactions with others.

I use the same technique in my mediations and collaborative law cases where I practice in Bellingham, WA.  During mediations and collaborative law meetings, I slow down myself and invite and remind the clients to slow down so that we can all find some inner peace in these distressing situations.

Try this at home - when you find that you are feeling uncomfortable or distressed, breathe 5-10 times.  Not short breaths, but deep belly breaths.  Do not respond when provoked.  Instead, treat yourself with compassion and kindness.  Remember that you are a fragile being and when someone speaks to you in a way that is distressing for you, SLOW DOWN and BREATHE.  Do not react.  Then ask yourself, why am I so upset?  What do I want?  Then see what you want to do next.  You always have a choice about how to respond.  Do you want to choose inner peace or disharmony? It is your choice.